SLJKHSILUYRIOUHISDGKUTSIUGISA Keyboard SMASH

I complained last night about my last week of work being awful. And it was, it was horrid.

This morning I walked into my building to find out the water heater on the third floor broke/exploded/committed suicide last night, and there was water everywhere. Our lab, which is a clean room, is useless. One of the upstairs offices looks like Mike Holmes took a sledgehammer to it and then left.

So, my job description now involves simply cleaning. A lot of cleaning. And repairing. And praying.

Mother. Mother fuck.

Recap

I realized I haven't posted any sort of update recently, despite the fact that quite a lot of shit has gone down recently that sort of changed things. I mentioned most of these events as potentials in earlier posts, and then never elaborated. I should be making cookies right now and not writing this, so I will make it short.

1. I bought a car about a month ago. A 2010 Toyota Matrix. It's white and I had the windows tinted and a sunroof installed and it's the sexiest beast on the road. Also, two days after I picked it up, I allowed Andrew to drive it, and he hit the biggest motherfucking raccoon that has ever walked the planet and cracked my fucking bumper and I didn't talk to him for a few days but that is another post all in itself. I would have pictures of the car, but it broke before I had the chance. I'm not bitter.

2. We're probably getting a puppy. A golden lab. Thanksgiving weekend. Maybe. I'm very excited.

3. Andrew finished a half Ironman. For real. For those of you who don't know, a half Ironman is a 2 km swim followed by an ass-raping 90 km bike ride and then to finish off your self-flagellation, a half marathon, or 21 km, run. It was in Huntsville and the weather was perfect and I have hundreds of pictures but I haven't transferred any to the computer yet.

4. My job has kicked my ass to Jupiter the past few weeks. A couple weeks ago we had an ISO audit, which was stressful, but fine. Then shortly after, everything started tanking in that the other lab tech was in a car accident last Friday and didn't come to work Monday and let me tell you, shit went south really fast. I got into work and one of our batches had failed a QC test so I had to remake it by myself. It also happened to be the largest mother effing batch we had ever made ever, so I was at work extra super-size free refill late. Tuesday and Wednesday I was at work half an hour late both days for differing reasons, then Thursday another fucking batch failed testing so we had to make it again and Jesus Fuck, I am so exhausted.

I can elaborate more on these points later. I may not. For now, it is time for sweet sweet lovin' with the television.

Are you happy with your long distance service?

Saturday night slash Sunday morning, I was snoozing away as usual when my phone rang. I picked it up. The clock said 2:36 am, and it was a private number. I did not answer it because I don't make a habit of talking to incredibly rude people that I don't know.

About 15 seconds later, my phone rings again. This time, I grab it and angrily answer, "Hello?"

There is a 6 or 7 second moment of silence that indicates the caller is a telemarketer who called me not once, but twice. At 2:36 in the morning.

A man says to me, "Hello?"

I say, "It's fucking 2:30 in the morning!"

I know that I actually said that, word for word, because I immediately felt my heart start racing at the thought that I just used the eff word in a conversation with a telemarketer. I live dangerously.

I wait for his reply. After a moment it comes: "Hello?"

I say, "Don't call me again" and hang up.

He didn't call me again.

It took me an hour and a half to fall asleep again, and I think it took Andrew about the same time.

Oh and also, it was the night before Andrew was running a half Ironman. I've heard sleep isn't all that important for that anyway.

La la la, la la la, la la laaa, la la la

Our neighbour Gary just brought us a bottle of wine for cutting his grass for him, and now I am a tad bit tipsy. You wouldn't believe the typing errors I am making.

We are thinking quite seriously about getting a dog. A vizsla. One of these ones specifically:


This breed is reportedly incredibly active, requiring at least 7 hours of good exercise a week. That works out to about an hour a day, for those of you with your fingers out. Since both Andrew and I are pretty active people, and we love being outside, this dog would be perfect for us.

I want one quite badly. We've been talking to a breeder who has a puppy available right now, so I guess we'll see if that pans out.

Wow, I'm really quite drunk. How embarrassing.

Anyway, that's what's been going on around here. I had a lovely long weekend. Yesterday was Andrew's birthday, I made him a beautiful chocolate/caramel tart with come dark chocolate ganache topping, it's pretty effing fabulous. It tastes rather like Cadbury cream eggs, which are a guilty pleasure of mine. No pictures though :( There were mini sparklers and everything.

I am supposed to be going for a run today. I should go sober up. Or something.